Didn’t plan on my new girlfriend getting pregnant

Dear Pastor,

Please for your advice. I am 52 but my girlfriend is 29. She has two children. We are living together.

I was living with a woman but she left and went to America. She left all her clothes and everything she had in the house. It has been four years but she has not returned.

We were corresponding on the phone but she suddenly changed her number. When she called back one day, she told me that she had linked up with a man and she hoped that I would not hold it against her. She is trying to get a permanent visa and I should not call her at certain times of the day or night because she told the man that she and I are no longer together. I told her that she should come home and she said that if I loved her, I wouldn't tell her that, because the man she met in America could do something for her and I can't. I said OK and that was the end of the conversation.

I am on the road every day, so I met this other woman and she told me that she didn't have anywhere to live. I told her that she could come and stay with me, so she has been here with her two children. I don't have anything against them. They are well behaved children and this woman has been doing everything for me, including meeting my needs in the bedroom. The children have their own room and they were already in school when I met this woman. The thing that bothers me is that after my woman in America found out that I have another woman living at the house, she called me and told me that what she heard. She said "I hope that she is not sleeping on my bed." She bought the bed we shared before she went to America. I asked her where the woman should sleep and she said I should take down her bed, lean it up and buy one for myself and this woman. I told her she is a crazy woman and that was the last time I heard from her.

But the primary reason why I am writing to you, Sir, is that I am in trouble. It was not my wish to have any more children because I already have five children with three different women. When I started to have sex with this woman, I was very careful. I had a box of condoms, but I used them all up. Now this 29-year-old woman is pregnant and I am going crazy at my age. I don't know what the hell to do. But this woman feels so happy to be pregnant for me. Mark you, I did not intend to take back the other woman who lived here with me, but I did not intend to father another child at my age.

I should let you know that my children are free to come and visit me and they have been doing so, especially in recent times. But we do not discuss anything about their mother. Pastor, I don't know what to do. This woman's stomach has started to show. She didn't have to carry this baby, but she wants it more than I do.

A.F.

Dear A.F.,

You have been careless. If you knew that you didn't want more children, you should have continued to safeguard yourself by buying protection.

The only thing I can say to you is prepare for an addition to your family. Don't let your new babymother, so to speak, feel that you will not be a good father. Provide all the things that are necessary for her to give birth. She has given you comfort, so, in your distress, comfort yourself also. I wish you well and that is all I can say right now.

Pastor